Last night, I got a very priceless lesson from a "master". That was very inspiring.
I used to feel very confuse and doubtful to take this step. Many things have been striking me in my thought lately and once again they became a barrier of decission.
But not last night. SenZei taught me many things. We brain-stormed and tried to open my mind widely. I shared all things that had happened to me in my life. We were also talking about principle, idealism, and character. And I realized that I need to slowly change and soften my idealism. Yeah... I know I was quite stubborn and try to keep my idealism. But eventually, I have to look around and take a bow. Not only use thought, but also use feeling to speak to your heart. Surely, I have to change. I used to close every little thing that I have, or am facing now. I didn't want to look fragile. I felt that I can keep it all for myself only and no one needs to know. But, it gets hard to keep it all. Just like a time-bomb, counting down to zero, and BANG....
And about "the other thing" that we talked last night, I think I'll keep it for us both. But, I will surely accomplish my mission. I am about waiting for the time. That's a promise, dude. I WON'T LIE TO MYSELF, and am ready to lose everything. It is just like a story of a "warkop-mini who is trying to fight with Starbucks, Coffee Bean, and friends." This warkop-mini has a 'hugo' dream to beat them all. Hhhmmm... Good luck little fella...
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