Got Slipped... and Trying to Get Back Up Higher

"Arrogant"; that might be the closest word that describes myself. For a moment I think that I have disappointed many people around me: my bosses, vendors, peers, my wife, and especially I have disappointed my own self.

"Overrated"; that one is also one of the closest word that describes what I think of my performance in office. Been doing extra miles, many jobs that are not exactly in my shop, and I thought I deserved much better rewards for what I have been doing. But, after knowing that I made a mistake which causes huge impact, I feel terrible, I feel useless. And it knocked me down to the earth and made me conscious that I am not that good enough. Not enough control, awareness, passion, spirit, determination, and the most important thing is HUMILITY. I was to cocky.

And now I got slipped to the very bottom of hollow, because my head was raised to high so I did not see what was in my path. So that I slipped and fell. I want to cry but tears don't come out. My disappointment of myself is extremely high. I am very embarrassed.

It is now very hard to face this as the peak looks so high right now. I can only cry myself and blame all the things that I did not do to make it all right from the early stage. There is only regret.

Now, I am trying to get back up higher than before. But, surely at this moment, I cannot expect that I can have wings to fly directly there. I will only have to trace it back one step at a time, slowly but sure and full of cautious.

"Hun, don't worry. People make mistake. Please don't get stressed out because of this issue. Trust me, happy and sorrow, we will face this together," my wife said.

Lord, thank you for giving me my wife. She has been very gorgeous to me over the years. Now, please let me face this with brave and responsibility. Let me have the spirit back to fix the broken things here. Let me always be reminded to always look down and humble, so that I won't fall anymore in the future.

AMEN