Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Losing Trust

It’s getting tougher for me day after day. I seems losing my trust to anyone, my friends, my family, myself, even God. Problems come over and over again. I’m getting very sensitive with what happens around, jealous with others’ success and growth, most part of myself prefer to step away from society, I lost my confidence. I pretend that I enjoy my current life, in fact, not at all.

Every day, I always try to find new job which really suits me and of course higher and higher payment. That’s true if I’m taking this job to get myself closer to my family, friends, etc. However, I don’t do it well. Financially, it’s getting tougher. All that loans for my bro and sis tuition fee are really make me crazy.

Even once, at one midnight, when everybody already went to bed, I found myself in front of my house really exhausted, sad, feeling down, yet, I couldn’t cry. I asked God why I can’t have lighter burden, smaller responsibility, or easier life. How can you give me all these trials? Why am I the one who should deal with it? Sounds weepy I guess, but why me? I even blamed my family for this.

My dad, who can’t throw away his ego to have a job or anything that can help me to earn a better living and fulfill this family’s needs.

My mom who totally-depended on me.

My sis, who can’t independently find another source of living, and still narrow-minded. But, I'm sure she's already thinking about this and trying to figure the way out.

Only my bro who knows how important to collect every single penny to fulfill his needs.

I’m sorry, but I have to tell the truth. Even I had a stupid thought to end my life soon. I was thinking that if I die tonight, my family will get money from my insurance. They can use it to continue life.

Oh God… I’m sorry… but it happened.

When deciding to take this loan, I first try to call few persons that might help me. I was once thinking to ask my friends about this. However, I don’t want to sacrifice my friendship with them. Hence, I asked to my uncle that I believed he has the capability for this. I told him that I’m honest about my salary now and willing to pay the debt in credit basis. I’ll arrange the auto-debit process to his account every month. But, as I guessed before, he said he didn’t have any money. But, days after, a new fancy car came to his garage.

God, where were You? I really need the money. I have any savings no more. It’s all for my family. Will You hear me here? I’m yelling, I’m begging, I’m kneeling down.

And finally I took the worst choice; I took a personal loan from a bank. And believe me that was very-very tough. I kept my promise, though. If I had to take a loan, then I would not ask it from my friends. I don’t want to screw my relationship. That costs very high, that’s priceless.

I force myself to keep believing that things will find their way. I keep believing that God will show me the way and take me higher, but I always found a big wall in front of me. I’m in a very bad situation. When I look to myself and think what is going on with me, I always hate myself. I fully regret not to do something good earlier. I’ve been enjoying myself too much. I should be the one who persuade my environment, not the one who get carried by the environment.

I’ve been attending 2-3 morning mass at St. Helena church in the past 2 months. I took the confession as well in May. I got few to tell about my sins. Most of all, I shared everything I feel this time. I’m down, lack of courage, lack of confidence, lack of faith.

I need to run away. I need to be alone. I need help.

In this kind of moment, I really need someone who can listen to me. I just realized, I really need a girlfriend. I can't easily share something like this. But, thinking of finding the right one for me would just worsen, wouldn't it? I don't know what to do now. I'm very sick of it.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

What is Love? (Platonic Love)

Before we get into the story of Plato and Socrates who talked about “love”, about two weeks ago, there was my friend’s wedding.

At Sunday, June 12, was Indah and Boris’ wedding ceremony. And again, I was helping them the whole day. Hehehe… Tired, of course, but happy to meet many friends from my previous company. Even though it has only been 3 months, but I admit that I miss them so much.

Plato and Socrates
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There was a moment in the mess where the priest told story about Plato and Socrates. Below is the complete story, I’ve googled and find the right version (the priest’s version was a bit different, but still caught my attention). So, here it is....

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One day, Plato asked Socrates: "What is love?"
Socrates said: "I ask you to pick a strain of the largest and most golden grain through this piece of rice paddies, but there is a rule that you can’t go back and you can pick only one."
So Plato began to do this. After long time, he came back with nothing.
Socrates asked him why he came back with empty-hand.
Plato said: When I walked in the field, I had seen a few strains with particularly big grain, but I always thought there would be a bigger and better one in front, so that I didn’t pick them up; But I found that the grain I saw is not as good as the last one, and finally I picked nothing.
Then Socrates meaningfully said: "This is love."

Another day, Plato asked Socrates: "What is a marriage?"
Socrates said:" I ask you to cut down a tree which is the strongest and thickest through the forest, but there is a rule that you can't go back and you can pick only one."
So Plato began to do this. After long time, he came back with a tree which is not as strongest as thought.
Socrates asked him why he cut this tree.
Plato said: when I walked through the forest, I saw a few good trees, and this time, I learned the lesson of grain and saw this tree still good, so that I just choose it for I'm afraid I miss the chance though it is not the best.
At this moment, Socrates said:" This is the marriage."

On another occasion, Plato asked Socrates:"What is happiness?"
Socrates said:" I ask you to across the field and pick a flowers which is the most beautiful, but there is a rule that you can't go back and you can pick only one."
So Plato began to do this. After long time, he came back and held the most beautiful flower.
Socrates asked him:"Is this the most beautiful flower?"
Plato said:"When I crossed the field, I saw this beautiful flower and I picked it up and recognizing that it is the most beautiful one, while I saw many other beautiful flowers later, but I still insist on this one is the most beautiful one so I took it back."
At this moment, Socrates said:"This is happiness."

Plato, one day asked Socrates:"What is affair?"
Socrates asked him to walk through the forest again without any rule and can walk back to choose the most beautiful flowers on his way.
Plato went out with confidence, after two hours, he took a gorgeous flower but slightly off,
Socrates asked him:"Is this the most beautiful flower?"
"I have been looking for two hours, and found this flower is the most beautiful, but it is wither down gradually during I came back" said Plato.
"That's an affair."

And one day he asked Socrates again:"What is life?"
Socrates asked him to walk through the forest without any rule and can walk back and forth to choose the most beautiful flowers on his way.
Plato had previous lessons and went out full of confidence
After three days, he still didn't come back.
Socrates had to go into the forest and find him, finally he found Plato has already lived in the forest.
Socrates asked him:"Have you found the most beautiful flower?"
Plato pointed to the flower beside and said:"This is the most beautiful flower."
Socrates asked:"Why doesn’t bring out?"
Plato answered:"If I take it off, it will wither quickly. Even if I don't pick it up, it also will wither sooner or later. So I just live beside this flower when it blooms, and find the second beautiful flower when it withered. This is my second flower which I found here."
At this moment, Socrates told him:" You know the truth of life".

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So there’s the story. It definitely made me realize that I should not be picky anymore. Once you think, you’re in the right way of having someone special in your life, do not think of any way or any possibilities that might come to you ahead, because love is not about possibility to have the right and/or most beautiful one, but to be ready to take everything with her/him with you for the rest of my life.

But, notice that, if I choose the one someday, that’s not because I desperate of having no options or am afraid that I would not get any single flower, but I learned from this story. Hehehe…

Friday, June 24, 2011

A little bit more

Well… like other amateur and undedicated bloggers, I do not consistently update and write in my blog. As I told in my first blog (back in 2008), I am not trying to be a pro blogger. This is not completely for sharing; it’s just my heart who’d like to tell and my fingers who’d like to type.

I surely have some topics in my head now and would like to share. Maybe first thing to write is about my brother who came back from Bali by end of May.

I guess he learned a lot from his training, and I always pray for him to have a great career in the future. I want him to learn from my experience. While you’re still very young, grab all the chance!!! That’s what I missed in my early career. However, it’s not a big regret though. I’m still grateful for what happen to me now.

I’m a bit relieved now as he is now having a job to complete his internship credits. So, he’s doing administrative thingy. And the good thing is he is paid. Though it’s quite low, I think that is also an advantage for him because he holds no title yet. Thank God for this.

In the beginning of April, in my early days in this new company, I feel a bit un-satisfied on what I’ve got. I think I deserve more. I never feel satisfied, until one time I happened to know the detail what everyone gets here. At that time, God opened my eyes, that we all have our own share. And my share is not bad. It’s fine. Now, it’s all about escalating myself into the highest level.

After 4 years, struggling with all of these, I’m about the end of my first responsibility as an eldest son: to support my bro and sis college fee. The following are to take care and being responsible for the whole family, and of course my family later.

Well, so I’m (almost) here… ;)

Sunday, April 17, 2011

HBD27


Happy bday to me....
I'm 27 y.o. now. Some things noted for this year's birthday are:
(1) I'm home in my birthday, was used to celebrating it with Spire.
(2) Though I'm home, my brother is not around. He's in Bali, but he doesn't forget, neither do my parents and sissy.
(3) We demolished the un-used front room in our house. We have larger yard now.
(4) My friends did the same old surprise which I had predicted before (so, no longer surprise).
(5) I'm getting numb. The shadow's fading out... Umm, NO. I guess it's gone already.
(6) Above all... I'm happy. And move on... With or without it...

Thanks BebsGaul... Oopss... They don't give me a present yet... ;)

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

i need to laugh like this

This baby is funny...
I need to laugh like THIS

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

malam penuh kegusaran (agak sedikit menyeramkan)

Semalam saya tertidur sambil duduk saat sedang mengerjakan pekerjaan saya. Dan saya bermimpi... kita skip dulu ya mimpinya. Nanti dilanjutkan.

Yang pasti setelah terbangun, saya tidak tahan ingin pipis, dan bergegaslah saya ke kamar mandi. Saat keluar kamar memang suasana sudah sangat gelap, dan saya memang biasanya sangat terbiasa dan cukup senang dengan ketenangan, kegelapan, dan suasana sunyi seperti itu. Namun semalam berbeda. Seakan setiap gerakan saya ada yang mengawasi. Entah "apa" atau "siapa"... yang pasti saya cukup tidak nyaman. Pun begitu setelah saya keluar dari kamar mandi. Seakan ada yang mengikuti. Walaupun ada rasa takut, tapi rasa penasaran saya lebih dominan. Dan setelah menoleh ke segala arah... memang tidak ada apa-apa. Tapi feeling itu sangat kuat. Entah apa atau bagaimana deh... yang pasti ada yang mengawasi dan memperhatikan gerak-gerik ku.

Setelah masuk kamar, di dalam kegelapan, dan berbaring sesaat, lalu memejamkan mata. Perasaan itu makin kuat. Sepintas terlihat bayangan orang-orang berbaju hitam sedang memperhatikan saya yang sedang tertidur. Menyeramkan memang. Tapi sontak ini membuat saya naik darah. Mengganggu istirahat saya saja. Padahal saya sedang butuh istirahat dan ketenangan. Akhirnya, saya memutuskan untuk berdoa (mungkin karna tadi tertidur dan lupa berdoa, jadi terbawa perasaan yang tidak enak). Saya melihat rosario saya yang memang glow in the dark. Lalu saya memutuskan untuk memakai itu, dan berdoa. Akhirnya... tidur cukup nyenyak, tanpa mimpi. Hehehe...

Kembali ke soal mimpi sebelumnya. Saya bermimpi bertemu dengan ibu katekis saya, pembimbing rohani, mama dari teman kecilku (Karen), dia: Tante Joyce. She looks healthy (not like when the last time I saw her before she passed away few years ago caused by breast cancer). She didn't say anything. But in front of her, there are Jesus and Mother Mary's statue. Also... there was white rosary which attract me a lot. I'm not sure what I did in my dream. However, there must be something she'd like to tell. It's still a puzzle for me.

I hope everything's gonna be okay. If there is something God wants to tell me... I hope I can read it and do something necessary. I don't want to disappoint anyone in my life. Fiuh... what a night...

Saturday, February 5, 2011

and... it's all DONE...

As you can see in the picture (please click it to enlarge), that was the hardest part after all my four amazing years in Spire. I was thrilled. And when I was composing the letter, my mom stood behind me. I wasn't sure if she understands the English or not (hahaha...), but her present at that time gave me more courage to move on. She knew it was very hard for me to leave this company. And one thing to be remembered from her advice was: GIVE THANKS, to God, Erwin, Jeff, Agus, and all my friends. That was pretty simple, right? But, she was right, I'm nothing without them.

Friday, February 4, 2011

why again??

So I got these two ladies which had been very best parts of my life. One's my ex, the other one is she-who-still-the-best.

I don't know... lately I've been talking, communicating, sharing, etc with both of them. And this strange feeling comes up again. I feel connected as I had felt long time ago.

With my ex, it's like she still needs me as a shoulder to cry on, as a man beside her to guide and lead. And somehow she said that it was a dumb decision to get separated with me years ago. I don't really care bout it, but somehow... it bothers me.

The other one also, lately we communicate and share quite frequent. This is what we always did. Ask other's opinion for something (e.g. problem, job thingy, deciding something, etc). I know this has only 1% opportunities for me. And it almost gone since she must do something that physically separate us even further. However.... she still shares it and keeps me in her loop. I really appreciate this.