Am I Crazy or Falling in Love???

Just had a chit chat this afternoon with N. She knew "it". Haha… Am I that obvious? I thought I hide it well. But, hmmm…. I can't deny… Yes I do…
Here is quote from "Crush" lyric from Archuleta. Some reflections. Hehe...

I hung up the phone tonight,
something happened for the first time, deep inside
It was a rush, what a rush

Cause the possibility that you would ever
Feel the same way about me
It’s just too much .. just too much

Why do I keep running from the truth
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized, and I just got to know

Do you ever think, when you’re all alone
All that we could be, Where this thing could go
Am I crazy or falling in love
Is it really just another crush

Do you catch a breath, when I look at you
Are you holding back, like the way I do
Cause I’m trying, try to walk away
But I know this crush ain’t going away, going away

Has it ever crossed your mind when we were hanging
Spending time girl, are we just friends
Is there more, is there more

See it’s a chance we’ve gotta take
Cause I believe we can make this into
Something that will last, last forever, forever

BebsGaul on Charity (Dec 8, 2008)

Tak kuduga dari sebuah ide kecil yg terdengar "spele", tapi memberi hasil yg cukup menyentuh. Berawal dari kongkow tengah malem bersama Bendot and Joko, timbul keinginan untuk berbuat sesuatu yang baru dan yg penting lebih "bermakna." Charity… Gue gak sangka si Bendot, biar 'downline'-nya bejibun banyaknya, tapi masih aware dan care sama sesuatu yg seperti ini.

Basic idea: kita collect duit jajan and hang out kita, trus kita sumbang deh ke panti asuhan. But apparently, we are willing to do more (not only transfer some money). We managed to spend the money for foods, milk, medicine, etc. And surprisingly, banyak temen2 di luar bebsgaul yang juga aware dan care untuk hal2 spt ini. And you can guess, we can achieve double of our target, even more.

So, the charity had done successfully yesterday at Panti Asuhan Mekar Lestari, Serpong. Thanks to all involved and participated (actively or passively) in our charity, i.e. BebsGaul (Joko, Pipi, Bendot, Chi, Romo, Juned, Gouw) as steering committee, Erwin, Novi, Melisa, Jon, Fifi, Selvy, Florensius, Handry, Denny, Averdy, etc etc. Sorry to publish your names here. There are no certain intention, only a piece of my deepest gratitude to all the support.

We plan to continue this periodically. Hopefully, we can have our own flag someday.
Tuhan memberkati....

The Ice is (slowly) Melt

Tadi… di Metro TV, gue abis nonton "Mario Teguh - Golden Ways" bareng sama bokap gue and Rio. It was all speaking about dreams, future, and family. In the middle of the show, there was a man, fourty something, asked: "Bagaimana caranya agar anak saya mengenang saya sebagai seorang ayah yg super, padahal saya sendiri adalah orang yg sederhana?" And Mr. Teguh answered: "Apapun kondisi Anda, berusahalah memberikan sesuatu yg hebat untuk anak Anda, berusahalah membuat anak Anda menjadi seorang yg hebat. Maka Anda akan dikenang oleh anak Anda sebagai seorang yg super."

Haha… Just wondered what his reaction is. He just smiled. However, I supposed to be a bit happy. Moreover, after he decided not to smoke again. It has been 2 weeks he doesn't smoke anymore. I understand this is very hard. And, I should support this. I have to melt the ice afterall. Sorry, Dad... for I was too stubborn. Let's start a new one. I'll try to be wiser. Thanks for the lesson.

Holiday with Spire @ Anyer (Nov 20-22, 2008)

WOW….. Anyer…. Akhirnya liburan juga sama teman2 kantor. Marbella, what a very nice place. Had fun, sun-bath, tattoo-ed, swam, beach-volleyball, tarik tambang, seafood….

Can't wait for the next trip with you guys….

Like Father Like Son...

Last night, I decided to go home earlier. Got headache and tried to take early bed.
But, it all screwed. Dispute happened, me vs dad. Dunno exactly what was wrong. Maybe I was hurting him. This was gonna happen when two stubborn guys met and argued for something.
Well, I have to go out from my house soon. Starts to have a new and independent life.
Sorry, Dad. You just look like me... No... I am the one who looks like you. We both the same... I hope someday we can understand each other. And money or other social thingy won't change my love to you, ma' bro' and sis'.

Disappointed...

Hey yo… I'm not in d mood today. It's like you've been competing in a championship for some time, motivated by a huge amount of prize and reward. Finally, you win the title. But, when you get the prize, it is not as worth as you thought. Wow… I was hurt... very very hurt... Once again, I was speechless. My gratitude dominated my ego. I was too weak to explode. Not enough TNT.

Easy....

Well...
Heavy is the burden to carry...
Hardly speaking... you're hiding behind the shadow, dude...
For how many long?? Your face laughs but your heart cries...
Ouw.. Yes...
I'm the great pretender...
Just laughin' like a clown...
I seem to be what I'm not...
You see, I'm wearin' my heart like a crown...
Pretending that you're still around...

Nevertheless, let it be my misery...

===========================================

Know it sounds funny
But I just can't stand the pain
Girl I'm leaving you tomorrow
Seems to me girl
You know I've done all I can
You see I begged, stole
And I borrowed

Ooh, that's why I'm easy
I'm easy like sunday morning
That's why I'm easy
I'm easy like sunday morning

Why in the world
Would anybody put chains on me?
I've paid my dues to make it
Everybody wants me to be
What they want me to be
I'm not happy when I try to fake it!
No!

Ooh,that's why I'm easy
I'm easy like sunday morning
That's why I'm easy
I'm easy like sunday morning

I wanna be high, so high
I wanna be free to know
The things I do are right
I wanna be free
Just me, babe!

That's why I'm easy
I'm easy like sunday morning
That's why I'm easy
I'm easy like sunday morning
Because I'm easy
Easy like sunday morning
Because I'm easy
Easy like sunday morning

(Lionel Richie)

Life is (so) short

Mmhhh.. hari ini gue berangkat lumayan pagi.
Abis anterin adik gue ke kampus, trus g lanjutin perjalanan ke kantor lewat Tomang-Slipi, etc. Sampe di lampu merah Palmerah gue agak bingung, "enak lewat pejompongan ato sudirman, ya??" Akhirnya, g putusin lewat Sudirman, secara gue lagi pingin ngetes motor gue yg baru aja diservis setelah 5-6 bulan. Sepanjang jalan GatSu gue coba hajar si Vega (motor gue). Emang kendaraan klo abis diservis enak banget ya. Gue narik 100 aja naiknya cepet banget. Saking serunya, gue coba lagi di jalan Sudirman dari sejak BenHil sampe SetiaBudi. Tapi, pas udah mo nyampe Dukuh Atas, tepatnya di depan Auto2000, gak seperti biasanya macet banget, mana masih pagi pula. G sih yakin pasti ada kecelakaan. Dan bener aja, setelah gue bisa ngelewatin macetnya, gue ngeliat sesosok tubuh dari seorang Bapak, pake baju safari abu2, tergeletak di jalan dengan darah segar mengalir dari kepalanya. Sontak gue langsung bergidik, kepala terasa panas, dan langsung memelankan laju si Vega. Bapak itu terlihat sekitar umur 45-50. Yang terpikir setelah itu, gimana keluarganya kalo ngedenger hal ini ya?? Gue gak kebayang shock dan histeris anak istrinya. Memang hidup ini pendek banget. Gak kerasa, waktu cepet berlalu dan garis hidup manusia gak bisa diprediksi. Kayak kemalingan aja, tiba2 semuanya hilang. So... Ati2lah... Life is (so) short, too short to do something useless.

Cukup Melegakan (setidaknya untuk beberapa saat)

Sejak sebulan lalu, gue tidur gak tenang. Banyak pikiran banget. Kerjaan lagi... kerjaan lagi...
Semuanya ini berawal dari masalah yg timbul sama project regular gue. Terancam tidak di-renew karna satu dan lain hal. Kalo ini gagal berarti secara gak langsung berimbas ke gue...

Pagi ini...
Gue sampe kantor jam 6.50. Masih pagi lah... beli ketupat sayur. Makan di pantry, sambil "ditemani" lappie-ku yg "setia" dalam suka dan duka dalam setahun terakhir ini.
Karna kemarin tak sempat buka laptop lagi, langsung lah muncul email dari "big" boss dengan subject yg bikin g deg2an. Biasanya klo subject nya gini nih, kalo ada query dari client. Pas gue liat (pelan-pelan), eh dia kasih tau kalo ternyata project gue di-renewed. Huufff...... spontan ati gue langsung... PLONG... Ternyata mrk msh mau juga pake kita. Memang terdengar aneh, kayak uang logam. Di satu sisi, lo merasa lega atas apa yg terjadi pada lo. Tapi di satu sisi lain, pasti terpikir mulai bosan untuk menjalaninya lagi. But anyway.... g gak mao bersikap negatif seperti itu lah. G cuma berharap semua yg g lakuin setimpal. Benih yang kutabur adalah buah yg kutuai...

2.00pm at cozy uncle JC's house...
Presentasi yang cukup lama (2 hours). walaupun cuma menunjukkan bbrp hal penting saja. Tapi dengan hasil yg cukup fair and thanks for your understanding, Mr. CR. This wasn't easy though, but we tried our best.

Setidaknya untuk bbrp hari ke depan gue bisa tidur sedikit tenang.
...

、マスターありがとう [Arigatou Gozaimasu, SenZei]

Last night, I got a very priceless lesson from a "master". That was very inspiring.
I used to feel very confuse and doubtful to take this step. Many things have been striking me in my thought lately and once again they became a barrier of decission.

But not last night. SenZei taught me many things. We brain-stormed and tried to open my mind widely. I shared all things that had happened to me in my life. We were also talking about principle, idealism, and character. And I realized that I need to slowly change and soften my idealism. Yeah... I know I was quite stubborn and try to keep my idealism. But eventually, I have to look around and take a bow. Not only use thought, but also use feeling to speak to your heart. Surely, I have to change. I used to close every little thing that I have, or am facing now. I didn't want to look fragile. I felt that I can keep it all for myself only and no one needs to know. But, it gets hard to keep it all. Just like a time-bomb, counting down to zero, and BANG....

And about "the other thing" that we talked last night, I think I'll keep it for us both. But, I will surely accomplish my mission. I am about waiting for the time. That's a promise, dude. I WON'T LIE TO MYSELF, and am ready to lose everything. It is just like a story of a "warkop-mini who is trying to fight with Starbucks, Coffee Bean, and friends." This warkop-mini has a 'hugo' dream to beat them all. Hhhmmm... Good luck little fella...

Mujizat itu nyata

Tak terbatas kuasa-Mu, Tuhan
Semua dapat Kau lakukan
Apa yang kelihatan mustahil bagiku
Itu sangat mungkin bagi-Mu

Di saat ku tak berdaya
Kuasa-Mu yang sempurna
Ketika ku percaya, mujizat itu nyata
Bukan kar'na kekuatan
Namun roh-Mu, ya, Tuhan
Ketika ku berdoa, mujizat itu nyata

========================================

Mmmhh....
Sounds weird... but... eventually, wishes come true. Although not all of 'em, but thank God for all. Now I get it, it takes time, not an instant result. I know that I shud b more patient. Needs determination and struggle though... and of course... pray...

Lebaran Holiday

Cangke lagi.... cangke lagi...
Liburan kok malah susah ya...?!?!?!
Yah... sempet2in lah akhirnya cangke sama anak2... sekalian ktemuan sama oom Eka (+Jon) yang baru aja balik dari Medan.
Yeah... Have fun... But... everyone knows I wasn't enjoying it. Dunno why or what, I just felt guilty and aarrgghhhhhh....... Lumayan bete sih sejujurnya. In addition, g lagi chiong banget hari ini. Dan semuanya kejadian tiap kali gue order makanan yang akhirnya tak kunjung datang.
Yah.. mo dibilang apa.

Anyway... The puzzles are getting solved. Seems like"someone" hit the decoy and mmmhhh.... just waiting for the story to come up. Haha... tricky shot, dude....
Okay.... Mayday... Mayday... Back to work....

*stevie log off...... *beep*

Questions, Puzzles, Riddles, or what... You mention!!

It has been 2 days passed, the last time we met together and had a great time in Juned's house. Was it really a "great" time? Mmmhh.. Not at all i think. It was just a day where every questions came up to my head and I surely could not understand what is happening here. That question (once again) appeared in my head, and is still haunting me everyday, moreover, when all was black-out.

Wow... damn... what a situation. On one side I need a moment, or anything to convince myself of what I've been planning so far. But in fact, I got another obstacle. I didn't get any convincing thing that night. However, I think what I have been questioning so far have come up piece by piece. That's why I'm collecting the puzzles now and try to arrange them.

At this time, I can't trust anyone right now, even the source. I just can't trust like that. So, let see, and time will answer. Sooner or later, this will be revealed. And when I see with my own eyes and hear with my own ears, I will believe.

And what if the puzzles are already solved? Should I change my mind, step aside and cross the street to find other direction? Or maybe I'd choose to stay, and try to fix all these "incorrect" things? Or... (sorry) cure the disease? Maybe the last one is too rude. But, well... let see what will happen next. At least, I won't lie to myself. And that's a promise.

Domba itu ternyata kambing

Wah.. benar-benar tak dinyana
Bahkan gembalanya terkecoh
Ini benar-benar hebat
Domba itu ternyata kambing

Lucunya gumpalan-gumpalan bak awan
polosnya wajah rumpun ternak itu
oh.. ternyata hanya baju
tak kukira dia kambing... sulit tuk kupercaya

memang kambing tidak jelek
tapi kepalsuan adalah cacat
dan cacat itu sulit lenyap
hanya niat adalah tabib hebat

Kering sungai ini
tiada riak apalagi arus
biar kutunggu hujan untuk memenuhinya
baru kutahu akan kemana dia mengalir

Hanya saja.. sampai kapan ini bertahan
semuanya serba semu
tapi aku tidak ingin lagi berbohong pada hatiku
apa pun itu, pasti ada jawabnya
semua ada jawabnya... harus kuyakini...

September is Invicible?? Not really....

Tau gak apa yang mao gue lakuin sekarang??
TERIAK....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wow.. for once in my career-life, i feel very EXHAUSTED. Kayaknya dah pingin larriiiiii.... yang jauh. Pingin ngilang dan gak mao ketemu siapa2. Bahkan muak banget sama apa yg gue kerjain. Emang bener kata Erwin: "You'll get the storm in March and Oct." Dan itu dah terbukti bener selama g kerja di sini. Issues in this project, troubles in another one, queries, etc. WOW.... damn.

Muncullah pula sebersit keinginan untuk mencoba hal baru di luar sana. Hanya saja banyak sekali perhitungan untuk mengarah ke sana. So, let see lah...

But, thanks to a wise friend. "The shortest distance between problem and solution is between your knees and the floor. The one who kneels to the Lord can stand up to anything." It helps, dude... helps a lot. At least it can heal me. All i need right now is encouragement, cos I need to move on. Thanks....

"Happy" Long Weekend

BANDUNG (August 17-18 2008),

MERDEKA!!!! Long weekend kemarin pegi ke Bandung sama temen2 begaul (Joko, Bendot, Romo, Pipi, Cici, Juned). Akhirnya... setelah lama pingin pegi keluar Jakarta kesampean juga. Jadi intinya lebih baik planningnya tidak matang. Just go with the flow. Yah... itung2 sekalian liburan. Walaupun dah sempet kbingungan mau nginep dimana, akhirnya kita dapet penginapan yang lumayan oke lah dan ada bbrp kejadian yg cukup "seru", e.g. that guy with Camry D 9 LO. Hahaha... let it be our secret... But... i think it is no longer a secret, since Pipi found that car at Andy's showroom, and... it belongs to Andy's bro. WOW.... what so coincidence, rite?

We met Aaron there and hanged out together. Very funny and just like old time... we had fun there. Tried some popular food sites and almost visited one of the spooky sites, Goa Belanda and Jepang. Huiii.....

It was quite a fun holiday, even though i was still struggling with my job there. Haha... how ironic... even others said: "Can u find another job, dude? We're on holiday." Yeah... it was very pathetic. And you know what... i'm thinking of looking for another job lah. I need life. I know sometimes it happens because of my mistake. I didn't manage my time well. But, once again.. did I ?? I don't think so. I managed them well. I believe that. But, things are coming and striking me with many problems that I can't avoid. But anyway... just let c lah. This is what i called as 'challenge' (really???).

Menyerahkah aku??

(demi sesuap nasi dan segenggam berlian -> quoted from a friend)

Hmm... beberapa hari belakangan ini banyak hal yang membuatku berpikir akan apa yang sudah kulakukan dan yang belum kulakukan. Apakah semua perjuangan ini harus berhenti dan memulai lagi dari 0. Seperti halnya sebuah goresan cakrawala yang dibuat oleh seorang pelukis, semua tidak akan pernah "lurus." Beberapa kali terpikir dalam benakku untuk menyerah dengan semua yang sudah kuikrarkan saat aku lulus kuliah.

Sekitar 4-5 bulan lalu aku pernah bilang: "Ini titik terendah dalam usahaku untuk mencapai karir yang lebih baik." Tidak banyak yang dapat kulakukan saat itu. Sungguh sangat jenuh. Seperti tidak ada kehidupan. Aku merasa tiada andil yang cukup untuk kubanggakan dalam pekerjaanku. Tapi nyatanya Tuhan masih berbelaskasihan. Hingga beberapa pekan ke depan... Deadline project baru menanti dengan timeline yang cukup menyiksa. Aku pun menyadari, bahwa selama masa itu aku tidak akan bisa banyak istirahat dan bersenang-senang.

Hari Rabu tanggal 6 Agustus 2008, sore hari. Adikku, Natalia masuk rumah sakit untuk bedah usus buntu. Di saat itu aku langsung mengeluh hebat kepada Tuhan, "Kenapa, Tuhan?? Tidak cukupkah semua ini? Di saat aku mulai merencanakan sesuatu yang bisa kubanggakan pada keluargaku dan diriku sendiri, semua ini mesti datang lagi." Sampai hari ini... saat aku duduk untuk menulis semua ini, aku merasa bahwa ini adalah kondisi di mana aku sedang berada dalam sebuah jurang yang sangat dalam. Sulit sekali bangkit dan mulai mendaki. Ini jauh lebih buruk dari beberapa bulan yang lalu. Sepertinya aku ingin lari dari semua ini, melupakan semua janji dan menghilang dari semuanya. Aku lelah... lelah sekali.

Walau begitu ada secercah harapan yang kudapat. Seorang pastor pernah bilang: "Mujizat bukanlah suatu representasi atas pengharapan yang instan, tapi adalah sebuah pengharapan yang terus-menerus dan penuh aktualisasi diri. Butuh keyakinan teguh dan semangat iman." Kita tidak akan tahu seberapa besar mujizat yang Tuhan berikan. Apakah kadarnya 75%, 50%, atau bahkan cuma 5%. Mungkin terkadang kita memang berpikir kalau sesuatu yang buruk terjadi pada kita, kita pasti mengira itulah saat di mana pengharapan akan mujizat itu sirna. Tapi aku ingat lagi dengan kata-kata pastor tadi, "Mungkin itu adalah tahap awal dari semua mujizat itu. Rencana Tuhan tak akan terpikirkan oleh Einstein sekalipun." Siapa tahu semua itu memang sudah garisnya. Walaupun garis itu seperti goresan sang pelukis.

Sekali waktu aku tertegun dan mulai berpikir lagi. Aku masih punya harapan, jalanku masih panjang dan semangatku masih bisa kusulut kembali. Semua tergantung padaku untuk mendaki lagi setelah terjatuh cukup dalam. Aku teringat, doa novena Santo Antonius-ku masih ada 6 kali lagi. Aku rasa masih ada kesempatan menggali kembali harapan yang sempat terkubur. Sungguh memang sulit hidup ini. Aku teringat akan perkataan salah seorang temanku: "Demi sesuap nasi dan segenggam "berlian"..." Sesaat aku berpikir kalau itu hanya lelucon semata. Tapi dibalik itu aku rasa aku bisa membuat penafsiran berbeda untuk memacu semangatku. "Berlian" mungkin akan kuanalogikan sebagai kebahagiaan dan kedamaian. Boleh saja kan?! Tinggal bagaimana caranya aku menemukan berlian itu. Semua tergantung padaku.

Novena (Day #2) and Gaul-ing on midweek holiday

Hmm...
Novena Selasa kemaren kayaknya lebih cepet tuh. cuman lebih ngantuk, secara gue lagi flu dan capek bener. sebelum mulai, ketemu thei-ku gue di luar. eh... langsung saja dia tanya: "eh... kamu mau minta apa sama Tuhan?? Pasti minta jodoh. biar papa-mama cepet nggendong cucu." Reaksi gue cuma: "BUSSETTT...... saya belom siap ngebrojolin anak orang thei-ku..." Dia bilang: "brojolin mah gampang... setelah "itu" yg susah" HAHAHAHA....... g gak abis pikir, sepupu gue aja rata2 pada married umur 25-30. kok gue dikejer2 mlulu ya...??? padahal masih 24 en menikmati hidup...

eniwei... kemarin khotbahnya cukup bagus kok. romo-nya meng-umpama-kan Yesus sebagai Air Hidup, sebagai "unsur" yang memberi kehidupan, jadi pegangan bagi banyak orang. Dan yang bagus... "air itu selalu lebih rendah dari daratan. kalau dia lebih tinggi dari daratan, dia akan meluap keluar, "membasahi" (=menghidupi) yang lain juga" Huehehehe.... gue lagi alim nih. jadi ngomonge ginian terus.

kemarin... tgl 30 Juli 08, pas libur midweek... gaul-ing again with the gaul-ers ke PP. makan pancious, kongkow, sampe ditegor karna kita nyapsa di pancious tanpa dosa. trus nonton di blitz tanpa tau apa yang akan ditonton sampe sumarso nanya ke orang lain di dalem studio. finally.... i was sleeping during the show... what a..... hhrrgggghhhh..... it was cartoon, named "Impy's island." Hahaha....

Dari PP trus ke TA ngambil golden puppy buat Joko... namanya siapa... eerrghh.... conan.. eh bukan... monty.. eh bukan.. pitung.. or apa gitu lah. yang pasti tuh puppy nengok2 aja klo dipanggil. kocak dah... after that dinner ke pluit, dan joko teteup... di dalem mobil gak mo ngelepasin si monty.. eh pitung.. conan.. eh siapa lah... so... Happy Puppy day...

Novena Besar St. Antonius dari Padua (day #1)

Wuih....
gue baru tau lo. ternyata ada novena lain selain novena tiga salam maria. di Gerja Hati Kudus, Kramat. Tiap hari Selasa. Untung si Erna bilangin gue. Bener2 beda novenanya. Sampe sono ada ruang intensi. ada list intensinya juga, spesifik pula. dari yang mau studi biar berhasil sampe dapet jodoh ada. nanti semuanya diitungin dan dibacain jumlahnya pas misa. Erwin juga ikut kok. Wiiihhh.... hahaha... mana duduknya agak ke depan. ngantuk deh tuh orang. gue juga ketemu kucong sama theiku, sama cucunya.

Hmm... mudah2an bisa ngaruh buat gue. let c for the next 9 weeks. i hope i won't miss any single day. and... hopefully, it can change my life.

Permohonan gue.... mmmhh....
1. Supaya.........
2.Semoga.........
3.Agar........
4.Mohon.......

Marilah kita mohon...... Kabulkanlah doa kami, ya, Tuhan.

Ordinary day - Jul 18

Fiuh...
O, mama....
gile, dari pagi kemaren ampe malem kayaknya sumthin wrong with me deh. ampir tiap saat, tiap jam, kepala aing sempoyongan, mirip kayak lagi naik kapal laut, bahkan ini lebih eneg, tapi gak mo muntah.

um thinking about Prudential now. haha... ngejilat ludah sendiri akhirnya. rasanya penting juga tuh. kalo ada apa2 (amit2.. tok tok tok) jadi gak terlalu worry.

sebetulnya pingin istirahat total sih tiap weekend, tapi yg ada di pikiran gue pas tiap jumat kayak gini nih, bawaannya HANG OUT, bibeh!!!
tar pulang dari office (sama anak2 kantor) entah mau nonton dark night/red cliff, nge-pool di afterhour, ato chang ge di happup. haha.... www.boros.com
trus besok, Ci Shianny's wedding. hmm... finally ya sis....
minggu chang ge lagiii.... waduh... cemana ini, berbahaya kalau anggota BEGAUL makin banyak, bisa kering ini dompet klo tiap minggu. but, anyway... enjoying life lah...

hahaha.... si joko apa2an sih. kocak juga. dia ngeblog lagu2 ciptaan dia yang notabene adalah semua pengalaman dia (mungkin). ga gue sangka lo, oom dakocan itu mellow abis. and... misterius.... duh.. pnasaran nih. cuman pipi yang tau kartunya. time will answer lah...

OK, then... i have a deadline now... continue later...

Journey to the "Last Island" (part 1)

"It's time to sail, my boy...
" That appeared in my mind few days ago. Hmmm.. I take it as challange. It happened when i was staring at my desktop pictures. It says: "These papers represent time as you may have realized it is passing, behave accordingly. I just wanted to remind you, Life is (very) short, Do it NOW....." and then bla bla bla... there are 4 more points
sounds pretty "serious" (hahahaha....)

So this is the story...

There is sailor (next will be known as 'sailor'). He lives in a very warm and happy island. It is just a small island, named Fam'e Island. It is not an island with gold or luxury, but this is island with full of love and warm. This makes him devote himself to protect this island.

Around this island, there are few islands. They are called Fran islands. Sailor visits those islands quite often. He finds it very friendly and welcome to him. He spends most of the weekends there and get back quite late. Other than these island, he also visits many beautiful islands along this time.

Until one day, he thinks of one island that has been dreamt of for years. He cannot understand why there is "that" island. Few years ago, he dreamt about this and reached an island that he thought is "that" island. Unfortunately, it was not like what in his dream, and he chose to leave that island and never look back. Now, he is still looking for that island, the Last island. He already sets all the things up to start the journey, but his responsibility to his own island is a bit holding him to stay and manage the island first. Many oppotunities has occured actually, but he cannot use it very well since he thinks that the island need him more than anything. That is why he abandons everything for that island as priority.

What will happen next??? (...to be continued)

Pertama...

Haha...
dont know what um doing exactly right now....
i think this is weird... tell a story/anything of yourself and let everyone knows..
weird blogging... i dont even know how to use it

anyway.. talking bout me right now.. i only need to escape... escape from everything. i'm a good runner.... hehehe... but not sure if i can or not. feels like you're struggling with yourself for something that is not yours eventually.
But, i believe... this is worth it after all. Whatever it is, or how big it is... i know that there shall be achievements and something precious for me. And again... it is not about how luxury the reward is, but this is all about pride and love, eventhough you need to sacrifice everything you have and dream of. That is what "love" is all about, isn't it? Sacrifice and sacrifice... sounds stupid and pity. but once again, i believe.... This is called as "total devotion."

i heard a voice said: "When you're down to nothing, God is up to something...."
So... you better believe it. Although i'm still running and escaping... but now i realize that i have to slow down and stop hiding.